We were connected.

We sat in a row, the five of us, waiting to see our friend Emily let her voice echo through the high ceilings of the church.

Sure, we didn’t know what we had gotten ourselves into. It was my first Grün-Donnerstag, and most of the others were feeling just as out of place under the arches of this five hundred year old sanctuary. All I knew was that I like Abendmahl/Communion, and Emily’s voice is pretty ballin’, so we figured we would give it a try.

We sat in a row, the five of us, trying to figure out how to navigate this experience. We were trying, but that is about all we could do.

I was getting nervous. I was running out of trying-energy, the cultural barriers seemed as strong as ever, and I was not really sure if I was understanding the instructions well enough to keep going. I was getting tired, starting to think that I should not have come… that I should cut my losses and just check out. Why did Church have to be so difficult? Why was it so hard to connect with God?

The pastor lifted the bread into the air:

“Nehmet hin und esset – Das ist mein Leib, der für euch gegeben wird.” (Take and eat – This is my body, given for you.)

Tearing it apart, she held the two pieces away from each other. After a moment, she began bringing them back together, saying “The Bread of Life, broken and given, so that together we could be whole.”

Once something is broken, it cannot be whole until the different pieces are brought together. If you give someone one of the pieces, you are now requiring their presence for the broken thing to be whole.

I may have failed at every other part of the service, but I understood this and so doing heard the Gospel again. I heard the Story of a God who chose Love more than the things He deserved. I heard the Story of a God who chose to be with us, and not only so, but bind Himself with us. I heard the Story of a God who wanted us so much that He gave Himself to us, and so doing brings us together with Him in His Wholeness.

We take the broken pieces and we eat them. We let them be inside of us. We are connected.

We remember that Jesus’ Story doesn’t end on Thursday night. Resurrection comes in a few days. Wholeness comes in a few days… or at least the foretaste of wholeness. He gave Himself to us. He bound Himself to us. He is waiting to be whole until we join Him. And one day, He’ll bind together the broken pieces.

I don’t always get it. There’s so much in life that I feel like I’m making up as I go. There is so much that is insecure and scary and lonely. But as I walk to the front of the church to take Communion, for a moment it is ok. Jesus is waiting there to tell me once again,

“We are connected.”

 

Still Wandering,

Tony